Quick and Easy Illustrations by Mai Manaloto
Fashion in a relationship does not have to be a difficult undertaking. It should be something fun that couples get to enjoy. Sulking into so-called feminine activities such as dressing up, shopping, looking sexy and undressing can all be part of the joys of being in a relationship. According to Carol Bruess who has a Ph.D. in Interpersonal Communication, and the co-author of "What Happy Couples Do", a man who is secure enough to get girlie with his woman shows that he is willing to make small sacrifices to make her happy since that is a priority. This means spending time with her like shopping without sending any signal of a morose expression and pouting the entire time.
Fashion is capable of igniting attraction. Many scientific studies have been done in order to identify what physical attributes make men feel attracted towards women such as dressing in the color red or just simply slipping into some matching lingerie in silky, delicate lace. Most men are unaware of the role of silhouette and color in their attraction towards the opposite sex, and women are smart - and we know how to use it for whatever holds our fancy. The question is, when it comes to relationships, is fashion even a big deal? For some women, it probably is a big deal especially if she is into fashion. Fashion is not something you leave behind once your 8-hour shift ends or you get to compartmentalize in your life. It is a lifestyle and is, therefore, part of your everyday life. A lady would really appreciate it if her man steps up his game in the fashion department.
There are absurd reasons why women would like their man to dress up at times, it's no rocket science really. One reason is that it is a form of effort and dressing up for each other can be a great way to keep things steamy. It's really the smallest things that matter in a relationship and besides, there is something about men who have a succinct style that makes them look so dignified and sexy. Another trifling reason is that women like to parade their man when they put on a nice attire. It makes a woman think how good they look together and how Facebook worthy he looks (this is for real). Women think about these trivial things in the hopes of impressing people from their social circle. Regardless of all the silliness, the point is, if a man expects his woman to maintain herself, then it is only fair for him to not let go of himself as well.
Over time, as the relationship grows stronger and you feel more confident in your love affair, there will be a tendency for a lady to sartorially sculpt her man. The easiest way to turn him into a man of style is by buying him clothes for his birthday, Valentine's day, Christmas and any other holiday you could think off - he would probably not even notice the motives behind those sartorial gifts since the exchange is done during gift giving seasons. In no time, you will see your mate taking up the clothing style you believe is fitting for him. Although there will be instances where your man will hold onto his conservative values no matter how hard you insist. For instance, two of the latest trends in men's wear (note that men's fashion develops at a snail’s pace) includes the deep V-neck that reveals their chiseled, patchy chest hair, as well as the European mankini which is a one-piece sling swimwear or also called a "suspender thong" or "sling shot bikini". However, some men simply resist joining the bandwagon. And that is fine, in a loving relationship, compromise has to be done.
That's exactly what relationship comes down to, meeting in the middle even when the discourse is about fashion and taste. There is this Latin maxim that pertains to the differences in preferences. It is "de gustibus non est disputandum" which translates to "in matters of taste, there can be no disputes". It basically means that things such as taste are not a matter of argument because each person has their own preference. It implies that each individual's inclination for, let's say, clothing are merely subjective opinions and therefore cannot be judged as right or wrong. Consider yourself lucky if you happened to snag a partner who is exactly like you, unless that's the case then perhaps it is best to ease your partner to trying new things in fashion especially if they have an actual stance on what they like to wear.
Clothing matters in a relationship can be tricky at times. Some women like wearing trendy pieces that have a salient image of being sexy. Even though a female intends to wear a certain dress to look enticing just for him, he might not want you to look so darn good for others. Men are envious creatures so they may have a tendency to be jealous and may allude that they wouldn't want people staring towards a particular body part that is being displayed, which most of the time pertains to the breast, buttocks or legs. It can be exasperating at times because regardless of whether a lady is in a relationship or not, she should dress however she fancies. It may be a form of body shaming a woman when her partner dictates what she can and cannot wear simply because of a premise that someone else will stare. But how is it different when a woman asks her man to change his fashion style? Us women are also guilty of body shaming our partner when we insist they dress a certain way or hide pieces of clothing that we despise. At the end of the day, what's important is respecting your partner's individuality as well as making an effort to make them happy - it's called sartorial compromise. As the saying goes, it's always better to bend a little than to break a loving relationship.
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